On the hunt...

On the hunt…

Matt and I are church hunting again. We have done this a few times as we have moved a few times (ok, we have moved several times, six times in three years to be exact). Thankfully, we haven’t had to find a new church each time, but when you move to a new state, it is time to find a new church home. To add fun and excitement to the hunt, you need to know that Matt is a little more conservative than I, so things he will not compromise on, I might find superfluous, and the vice versa  is true as well. We both believe in the same the path to salvation, baptism by immersion, taking communion at least once a month, and tithing.

We have gone to small churches and mega churches, some packed to the gills others nearly empty.  We’ve heard sermons on all sorts of topics by preachers from all sorts of seminaries.  We’ve heard music ranging from centuries old hymns to Pink Floyd (yes, Floyd at church). We’ve gone to services that are home-spun as well as those mimic concerts with dramatic performances.   What kinds of weird things have we experienced? One pastor swore during his sermon (I think it was an accident); one pastor liked to quote scripture, but only parts of verses, to tailor make his sermon; one pastor used a live snake and mouse to give an analogy of God’s hands protecting us from the evil of the world (Matt had to keep his eyes closed for part of that sermon); we’ve had little old ladies send us “dagger eyes” when Sloane would giggle in church; for the most part, our first time visits have gone well, but  we never know what to expect.

In our journey to find a new church, we are following the same path we have taken in the past. Church hunting is very similar to house hunting.  You look up places that you’ve driven by as well as an internet search of churches in your area.  Using the sites, you can quickly eliminate anywhere that you know you won’t like or doesn’t suit your needs. Matt and I look at the “what we believe” section first (almost every church has this section) as this helps us weed out places we know we will not like. Then, it is usually onto the “about us” where you can find out key things like denomination (or not), dress code, kid-friendliness, service times, and anything else they may deem critical for visitors and members to know.

We both make sure to check out the Children’s Ministry section to see what they offer. Usually, it outlines their nursery policy and explains what programs they offer to kids of all ages. Some even let you download the forms you will need to fill out, so you won’t have to wait in line when you get there, always a plus!

Now that we have done this a few times, I have learned the following: nursery workers are volunteers (read they will be late), if they are, it gives you time to look around to see how clean they keep the place; it is someone’s job to greet visitors, they want to make sure you feel welcomed and have any questions answered, so if you have them, be sure to ask them; regular attendees will come up to say hi, don’t be shy, let them know you are new and that you are church hunting;  some people are hand-shakers, others are huggers, if you are offered a hug take it!; most churches now offer a continental breakfast, which you can eat during the service (I think this is kinda weird, but maybe I am old fashioned), some charge for it, some don’t, but if you are running late, it is a nice thing to offer!

If you have a church home, I would highly recommend   checking out your church’s website, facebook, and twitter accounts. See how up-to-date they are, and if they are really old, help to get them current. Do you have any interaction with visitors? All you have to do is say hi and shake hands – trust me it goes far!

If you are searching or thinking about going to church, I urge you to visit a church you have driven by, read about, or have been invited to by a friend. Don’t feel pressure to join, but give it a try, you may walk away with a silly story (swearing! snakes! mean old ladies!) or you may find a place to call home.

Product Placement

My New Normal – Product Placement

We have been very fortunate, Sloane doesn’t really notice commercials, labels, or signage. Don’t get me wrong, if we drive by a Coke truck, she can tell you it is a “Big Soda Truck!” But, other than that, she is very happy in her world of toys, Mama and Daddy and Nozzo, and her favorite shows. If you mention McDonalds or Chuck E. Cheese, she will do a happy dance and ask to go, but we rarely get fits of begging to go somewhere or eat at a fast food place.   Matt learned that Sesame Street Live would be coming to our new home town, so he got tickets. I am not sure who was more excited about the show, Matt or Sloane.

We found out that we could get to the show an hour early and play on some set pieces and maybe meet up with a few of the characters. We got there 20 minutes before the door opened and guess what we found out? There is a velvet rope – for toddlers. If you are willing to shell out $65 per ticket, you can come even earlier for a meet and greet with all the characters, play on the set pieces (while the rest of us look on – behind the ropes), and have professional pictures taken with Elmo, Rosita, and Cookie Monster.  Those of us who were not willing to pay the extra cash looked on at the photo op going on and guess what? Sloane was perfectly content to hang out with us and wave at Elmo and Cookie as they walked by.

Once the flood gates opened, we played on Elmo’s piano, Big Bird’s nest, the famous 123 door stop, Oscar’s garbage can, and watched a few dance pieces the cast performed before the show.  They also had several booths set up to buy t-shirts, candy, toys, pennants, hats, and re-useable bags. Sloane didn’t really even notice them, she was too busy watching the character’s dance or was people watching. We did let her pick out an Elmo shirt, she didn’t ask for anything else, and we were happy!

As we walked to our seats, the concessioners slowly started to come in, selling cotton candy – for $5 a pop. Sloane saw other kids eating it and wanted to know what it was – we told her – when she asked for it we told her, “no, but you can have a sucker.” (I always have emergency suckers and fruit snacks). She was more than happy to unwrap and chew on a sucker.  The show started and she was entranced for the full 40 minutes. Then came intermission…

No sooner had intermission started did a man walk down to the center of the theater and stand about three rows in front of us with a gigantic collection of Elmo balloons – for $5 each. Parents and Grandparents lined up and bought almost all of them – Matt and I were not shocked, but $5 for a mylar balloon? Come on people! Sloane asked for one, we took a picture of the big bunch and told her that she could look at the picture whenever she wanted. That made her happy and she had another sucker. Just before the break was over, they made an announcement that those who had bought balloons of pennants should put them under their seats until the show was over. “Yeah right – good luck with that!” a few of us muttered. And the fun began again.

She made it through most of the show and yes, a few balloons popped up, but for the most part, they stayed put.  She had a great day and her new shirt has already had some bonding time with Tide Stain Release.  What did we learn from out trip to Sesame Street Live? Our kid is very happy with what she has and prefers to hang out with us. This makes my heart sing! I know that the requests for McDonalds is soon approaching, but for now, I am going to relish the contented little girl I have (and remember this time when the begging and pleading begins!).

Thank you Jesus!!

My New Normal 3 Thank you Jesus!

So I went and got a job; subbing for a wonderful school district – the one we live in as well. I tried to get a teaching job and discovered that people with 12 years experience and a master’s degree are not likely to get hired because they cost too much. By subbing, I could back ease into the working world and let Sloane get used to daycare.

Before I even applied for the job, I made sure Sloane had good, experienced childcare. We hired (by verbal contract) a family friend who had watched other kids we know and they all love her. She was a smoking deal price wise and flexible with hours. It was a dream come true! I applied for the job, had an interview and was hired in less than a week (much, much faster than I imagined). Thank you Jesus!! I then called our childcare provider to let her know when we would be starting with her. She then told me she decided to retire and would not be able to watch Sloane. WHAT!! DO!! YOU!! MEAN??? I was screaming inside, but I was polite and wished her well, hung up, and had a mild panic attack. 

I called Matt, let him know and he gave me some wise advice, “Call my mom, she may know of someone who can help.” Mom did in fact know of someone and gave me the names of a few decent daycare centers. Under her advice and Matt’s I called a family/church friend who used to run an in-home day care who graciously agreed to watch Sloane until we could find something permanent. Thank you Jesus!!

Next came several hours of web searches, phone calls, and number crunching.  My heart was breaking when I would find a great place only to find out they opened later than we needed and closed way too early. We were put onto two waiting lists in our top two choices. Then a spot became available, then possibly another. Thank you Jesus!!

I seriously wanted to break down and cry several times this week, then I was reminded about what I prayed in the days before my interview, “God,  if you want me to have this job, have them make an offer, if not I will know.” They offered me the job 20 minutes into the interview.

If God was going to provide the job, HE would also help us find the best place for Sloane.

We are visiting both centers on Friday. If you have a chance, say a prayer for us, that the best place for Sloane has an opening. Thank you and thank you Jesus!!

My New Normal

The New Normal

I never considered myself  materialistic, sure, I like nice things and can tell the difference between a name brand a fake from a mile away, but me, materialistic? No way! I am a “good” Christian woman who hasn’t been to a mall in months, carry a backpack as a purse/diaper bag, and wear my shoes until they have no soles left. I have learned many things in the past two years, one of the biggest lessons has been “It is just stuff.” What follows is how I learned that lesson and what it is still teaching me today.

We have moved four times in the past two years. No, we are not nomads, world travelers, or eccentrics.  The funny thing is that we never planned on moving. When we moved into our house in 2008, we both said that we were not moving again. As the saying goes, “People Plan, God Laughs.” Fast forward two years, my husband Matt and I are both out of work and we needed to sell the house. Thus, the first move was to clear out our house to get it on the market while Matt looked for a job and I became a stay at home mom; we moved in with my in laws. It really wasn’t as bad as it sounds. I married into a wonderful family that understands “life changes” better than any other group of people I know. My MIL made space for us in her home, we put most of our belongings into storage, fanned the rest out to family who had space to spare, and waited. That was late March. In May, Matt got a job. In South Carolina. You should know he travels for work, so having him work out of state is unusual. He leaves Monday morning and comes home Thursday night. We have had this set up since we met, it doesn’t make marriage any easier being apart four days a week, but, we know how to work with it.

 I am digressing… in June, Matt was able to work out a deal with his employer to move us to S.C. while he works there. They saved on travel expenses and we got to be together. We really like South Carolina, the weather is mild, the winter is not too bad (compared with MO winters), and the people are friendly. Matt was scheduled to be in S.C. for about a year. Around May, I started applying for jobs in MO. We moved back into my in laws in June, hoping I would find a teaching job. We have discovered that experience and education doesn’t always make you more desirable to employers.  We considered moving other places, prayed about it, and decided to stay in MO and I would continue to stay home with our daughter. So once again, we moved, into our newest home, a lovely townhouse.

Remember me telling you about putting our stuff into storage? We realized we had way too much stuff (we had a four bedroom house) than we could fit into our new place. So, we trekked down to the unit and started to sort out what we needed and what we didn’t. What did we find? We had lots of clothes we never wore, too many kitchen supplies, a few broken treasures and spiders. They seemed to love the dark space. We quickly learned to wear gloves when moving and unpacking boxes, just in case. To combat the spider infestation, yes, it was that bad, we used a bug fogger to be sure we were not moving any new tenants into our new home.

Then we found mold. Yes, mold. Turns out our unit had a bit of a moisture issue, and not in a good way. The thing about mold is that it doesn’t care what it grows on, as long as it can grow. Little did we know, this mold loved our stuff. As we sorted through box after box of things we thought we couldn’t live without (like my leather jacket), I started to find my self saying, “It’s just stuff, Kim, it is just stuff.” We had to throw away some pricey items, like two mattresses, box springs and a roll top desk. Matt took it all in stride, I think because he knew we wouldn’t have to move the stuff again, just find a dumpster for it all. 

As I started to unpack, knowing I would have to wash all the clothes because of the bug fogger, I found more mold and mildew. Once again, I found myself lugging boxes of clothes to the trash mumbling, “It is just stuff, it is just stuff…” We found mold inside dressers, on TV trays, in our daughter’s changing table. Now instead of a simple unpack from yet another move, I was going to be doing a full on scrub down of everything we owned. “It is just stuff…it is just stuff.”  

Matt didn’t get upset when we threw away his leather gloves, pairs of jeans, hats, and scarves. What got to him? His plasma TV, damaged in the move, rendered totally useless. When we discovered it had broken, he took a deep breath and said, “That hurts God.”  He wasn’t furious, just ticked off – as most men would be when their 42 inch plasma TV dies an unexpected death.

Two weeks after moving in the laundry is finally done (took two weeks to get it done), the furniture is scrubbed and vacuumed (spiders), and only two boxes remain unpacked. Do I anticipate throwing more stuff away? Yes. Am I used to those walks to the dumpster? No. Is it getting easier? Yes. It is becoming my new normal…